Been quite a while...

Yes, it's been quite a while I've blogged here.. Coz there is not much to talk about right now..it's like I have 2 lives..one which everyone knows about..the happy, alright me..and one which is a deep dark secret about what I face every other day..

And I'm tired..I so want to lay down my head and wake up to a day with a song in my heart..it seems so long..so long that I've laughed or smiled a genuine smile.. part of me thinks it s not a great idea to be writing about this here..this is a blog to give hope afterall..yet what do you do when you feel like you have had enuf..when your patience has reached its limit? And yes, the normal folks out there with just one life..tell you to get over it..coz its all in ur head..I would agree with them while I was like them SO I'll leave it at that..Today I know better..i've tried to talk to folks and cheer them up..many times..yet today I need cheering up..

I just feel lost and lonely most of the time..one day just flows into the next..and thats how its been for a year now.. I look around and see people smiling and pray its real..this is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.. Emotional pain is the most painful of it all esp at a point when you are on an all time low..like now..

And I wonder ..there is an angel for each of us they say..who is there to wipe away the tears..
Right now..I'm just wondering where's mine..

" When you have nowhere to go and nothing left..you realise God is all you have and perhaps all you've ever needed"....